From Analyst Monkey to King of the Jungle MD: The Investment Banking Hierarchy

“This is not a fraternity house,” my staffer explained as he hauled me into a small conference room.

“Some of the MDs have complained about how messy your desk is, so clean it up.”

Genuinely curious, I replied, “Were you referring to the empty Red Bull cans or to all the papers too?”

Not a good start to your 3rd week on the job.

I told this story to a few co-workers afterward and they all laughed and responded the same way:

“He’s lying, a bank is exactly like a frat house.”

They were right – just like a fraternity, there’s hazing, a hierarchy, and certain rituals you must go through to advance.

While this site has been analyst-focused in the past, today you’re going to learn all about this hierarchy, how much you get paid at each level, how the work differs, the average age range, and the possible exit opportunities.

And if you’re curious about hours please stop reading this site right now.

Bottles and Bottles? How You Really Win Clients and Land Mega-Deals as an Investment Banker

Why does the mainstream media hate Wall Street so much?

You can think of dozens of reasons, but one of the biggest is that they don’t understand what bankers really do to earn their fees.

They see news of million-dollar bonuses and assume that financiers earn those bonuses by sitting around and playing Monopoly.

But you don’t earn massive fees by playing board games all day – it’s a process that takes years, which is one reason why bankers make the money they do.

And the infamous “pitch” has very little to do with it.

Industry Groups vs. Product Groups: Got Exit Opps?

“Yo, M&A is the best, right?”

“Why would you ever take an industry group over M&A or Leveraged Finance? Don’t you want to buy entire countries when you move into PE?”

“If you’re not modeling you’ll get bottom-tier bonus!”

Ah, yes: the industry group vs. product group debate.

Just like the debate over cardio vs. strength training, models vs. bottles, and boutiques vs. bulge brackets, there’s so much fervor on both sides that you’d almost think war was about to break out.

Actually, I lied: it’s not quite that heated, but let’s dive right into the debate and see what the arguments for both sides are.