“Vacation time? People come and work at this firm for one reason: to become filthy rich. That’s it. We’re not here to make friends. We’re not savin’ the bleepin’ manatees here, guys. You want vacation time? Go teach third grade, public school.”

-Jim Young, “Boiler Room” (2000)

Christmas Eve, and what an appropriate topic. If you’re in your cubicle reading this, my condolences: I was actually in that same position last year as well. But most bankers, believe it or not, are actually on vacation right about now.

Vacation? Yes. It does exist, even in this job. What else are you going to spend those investment banking bonuses on? Beyond just the typical “What are investment banking hours like?” questions, this is another common one I hear. Can you actually take a vacation as an Analyst? Do you ever get any time off? Can you go home for the holidays?

Doing The Work, Hedge Funds, Investment Banking Lifestyle, Private Equity | 1 Comment »

“I live in the American Gardens Building on W. 81st Street on the 11th floor. My name is Patrick Bateman. I’m 27 years old. I believe in taking care of myself and a balanced diet and rigorous exercise routine. In the morning if my face is a little puffy I’ll put on an ice pack while doing stomach crunches. I can do 1000 now.”

-Patrick Bateman, “American Psycho” (2000)

Back in the day, it was easy for investment bankers to stay fit. If you’re anything like Patrick Bateman here, can you too use a combination of diet, rigorous exercise, stomach crunches and facial cream to stay fit and look young?

Probably not, at least if you are really understanding investment banking. It’s a massive change from your student lifestyle (and Bateman is a fictional character). Those convenient breaks in between classes when you went running or went to the gym no longer exist. Now you have coffee breaks where you go to Starbucks and get 200 calorie lattes. And you have those $30/night dinners where you almost feel compelled to order the 20 worst foods in America. Yes, this is what investment bankers do: get fat.

Investment Banking Lifestyle | 3 Comments »

“The first thing we do, let’s kill all the lawyers.”

-William Shakespeare, Henry VI Part 2, Act IV

Decided to kill your career in law and switch into banking? Want to be paid by the results instead of by the hour (and hopefully make one of those astronomical investment banking bonuses)?

The good news is that it’s fairly common for lawyers to switch into finance and investment banking specifically.

Career Change, Getting A Job, Interview Tips, Law | 16 Comments »