So we decided to do something a little… different for bonus news this year.
And no, not just because everyone was expecting bonuses to collapse in a fiery apocalypse.
What actually happened was far less destructive: bonuses decreased by less than what many people were expecting, and our predictions from a few months ago were almost 100% accurate.
Investment Banking Bonuses: 2007 to 2012
Here it is in all its glory: our very first infographic.
And it’s on a topic that you might just be slightly interested in (click the image below to view the Large version… or click right here).
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Oh you wanted textual explanations as well? Ok, fine, here goes:
I’ve been getting requests to publish this year’s investment banking bonus predictions.
And I’d like to fulfill those requests, but there’s one small problem: there will be no bonuses this year.
Normally investment banks wire transfer analysts’ bonuses directly to their bank accounts upon announcing the numbers…
This year, however, it was revealed that protesters had Occupied the bank accounts of all analysts worldwide, hacking into banks’ websites and stealing all the funds before anyone could withdraw the money and blow it on a trip to Vegas (or a trip to Cain).
It’s unknown what the protesters will use funds for, but early rumors point to using the money to send envelopes containing white powder to banks worldwide.
Good luck getting those bonuses back!
Banks seem to announce bonuses later and later each year, and for good reason: with the economy in worse shape each time around (OK, maybe things improved slightly in 2010?) no one wants to be the first to commit to real numbers.
And while the US and Europe came very close to the brink of bankruptcy over the past year, banks themselves remained afloat – so they had enough money to award bonuses.
The good news is that even Citi and UBS were able to pay bonuses this year, and that my predictions a few months ago were on the low side.
But the bad news is that the actual numbers weren’t too much higher – and they won’t be much better next year, either.
The Cold, Hard Numbers